How To Refocus Your Finances

Hi. Remember us?

Yeah, we sort of lost track of our blog about three months ago when it fell into the abyss between Mt. Busy and Mt. Really Busy; they're two peaks in northern Vermont on the road to Overwhelmington, overlooking lakes Where-Has-Our-Life-Gone and It's-February-Already. (Yes, those are real lakes.)

These past wintry months have brought a lot of exciting changes into our lives. Right now, we're a week into sub-zero temperatures and I feel sort of like our life was put into a little snow globe and had the daylights shook out of it. Except what's falling down around us isn't fake plastic snow, it's a crazily scary, busy, fun, weird, roller-coaster ride of uncertainty. Our home is almost sold. Neither of us have full-time jobs. It was 30 below on Tuesday.

Whether we like it or not, a financial refocusing is what we have to do right now, and with Christmas having come and gone and New Year's resolutions in full-swing it's likely that's where you're at too. Getting back into the habit of budgeting and financial planning may sound daunting, even overwhelming, but here's the truth: it's easier the second time around.

If your financial focus has fallen by the wayside, the only thing that makes it seem difficult to start back up again is your memory of how difficult it was the first time. Do you remember the first time? I do. It was six brutal months of weekly budget meetings between me, a money spender, and my wife, a money hoarder, butting heads, bickering, crying, until we finally figured out how to do this "budgeting thing" together.

But the second time around isn't like the first. We know the drill. We know what we have to do. Thankfully, Danielle and I never really quit doing our budget meetings, we just have them once a month now instead of once a week. Still, with the major upheaval our life has undergone these last few months, it's time to sit down and figure out what our financial priorities are. This isn't a bad practice to do every once in a while. So...

Think Small

Refocusing your financial goals needs to be broad in scope, but small in steps. One of the reasons people veer off course is because they set their goals too far ahead. Their goals become too unobtainable. They get discouraged. They quit. This is why Dave Ramsey's Financial Peace University approaches budgeting with the "Baby Steps." The first step—get $1,000 of emergency money in the bank—is obtainable within a month for most people. Seeing progress that quickly is encouraging and helps you to realize that, yes, this budgeting process can work!

So as you refocus your finances, make your goals realistic. Maybe your broad goal is to pay off the house in the next ten years, but for this month make it a goal to put an extra $100 down on the mortgage, or $1,000 in six months. The way we handle money is tied to our emotions, and our emotions are motivated when we see progress, so set obtainable "baby steps."

Keep Those Meetings Coming

You and your spouse need to be making your financial plans together. Maybe, if you really love crunching numbers and your spouse doesn't, you can handle it on your own, but you need to at least make an effort to include your spouse in what's going on. Danielle and I talk about our finances a lot. We help keep each other focused and motivated. Knowing what financial dreams are on her mind are important to me, and, frankly, I couldn't do all this math crap without her.

Pray

No financial plan should begin without consulting the One who owns it all anyway. "Everything comes from You, and we have given You only what comes from Your hand," 1 Chronicles 29:14. God knows your future far better than you do. He knows what storms are coming your way and how He's going to provide for your every need. You and your spouse—or financial accountability partner if you're single—need to keep God on the front lines of your financial goals.

So start there. Pray. Think small. Keep those budget meetings in the pipeline. Let us know what you're struggling with so we can pray for you and learn more about this stuff alongside you.

Keep pinchin' :)

Budgeting Myths That Are Probably Ruining Your Life

Belief shapes behavior. If you believe Star Wars is superior to Star Trek you'll probably enjoy finding opportunities to slam Trek fans. If you believe eating chocolate is good for you, you'll probably get fat. If you believe that budgeting isn't necessary you'll probably go broke.

And if you are struggling with managing your money it might be because you're believing lies about the budgeting process. If you follow our blog at all you know that Dani and I budget regularly—if for no other reason than the fact that it works!—and we want you to be a budget-head too. It can be really hard to get started, but not because budgeting is actually hard—trust me, it's not—but because many people buy into some of the myths that turn the budget into a bad guy.

If you're smart—and we believe you are—then you can learn to let go of these myths, excuses, and misunderstandings, and start building the wealth you've always wanted to have.

Budgeting Myth #1

I don't have time to budget.

Sure, budgeting takes some time, but there's a difference between not having the time and not having the motivation, which is most likely the case, wouldn't you agree? Getting a budget up and running might take a few hours, but after that all it takes is a few minutes a week.

Want to know how much time Dani and I spend on our budget? About one hour a month. We keep track of our receipts and expenses, which takes a few seconds here and there, and at the end of the month we get together to compare our expenses to our budget, make adjustments, and plan for next month, but in total it probably doesn't take more than one hour.

Managing your money needs to be a higher priority since it is one of the largest contributing factors to the quality of your life. We have lots of posts to help you create a budget. Click here.

Budgeting Myth #2

I'm not good at math.

Oh, be quiet. Nobody is as bad at math as me. I loathe math. I jumped for joy when I finally graduated high school for the simple fact that I never had to open another math book again. There simply aren't enough synonyms for the word "detest" to describe how much I hate math.

And yet I budget.

Seriously, budgeting isn't rocket science. You've got your monthly income. You've got your monthly expenses. Those two numbers need to equal zero. Wham. Bam. There's your budget. You're welcome :-)

And thanks to budgeting software, you don't have to be good at math, you simply have to be able to follow instructions. Many of these programs are free and can be safely downloaded without fear of viruses or spyware from CNET's download.com. If you know how to use spreadsheet software, you can even make your own budget. Or, if you're like me and Dani, you can use paper and a plain, old-fashioned number 2 pencil.

Not doing a budget because you don't like math is a really lame excuse. Dave Ramsey has some really simple budgeting forms to help get you started.

Budgeting Myth #3

I keep track of budgeting in my head.

Uh-huh. Yeah. Sure you do. And that's why you never bounce a check, never find yourself overspending, and are sitting on a mountain of liquid cash. If you can seriously do a zero-based budget in your head every single month we’ll just assume you are the most brilliant person on the planet. Could you please help our government make a budget?

A budget in your head isn’t a budget. It’s just a vague-idea-of-what-I-spend deal-ish thing. To work, a budget needs to be written down so you can physically keep track of your assets. Moreover, if you're married and doing a budget in your head, how does that help your spouse? Guys, I'm talking at you! (And some ladies). You need to keep your spouse involved in the financial decision making.

Budgeting Myth #4

I don't need to budget because I keep track of everything I spend.

Great! That's budgeting. Sorta. Well, it's a start, but it's not a budget. If you're only keeping track of spending than you're only keeping track of the past. What about the future? The point of having a budget is to look ahead and plan for the coming month, year, and lifetime. You need to make plans for the money you haven't spent yet. Look forward AND back, not just one or the other.

Budgeting Myth #5

I want to be free to buy the things I want.

Cool. So do I. And that's why I budget. That doesn't mean I impulsively purchase every single thing I see, it means I've developed enough self-control to know where I want my money to go. If you like buying movies—like I do—budget for it. If you like getting coffee every morning—plan ahead. Need a new car? A camera? Need some landscaping done? Make. A. Budget! If you've got a budget for these things you will always have the money set aside for them, because a budget, over time, can build a cushion that provides increased purchasing power.

Read that again: increased purchasing power. Ooooh, I like the sounds of that!

The more of these myths—and others—you believe the more your actions will be defined by them. Don't let your future get bogged down under the weight of so many lies.

Keep pinchin' :-)

Getting Back To Basics When Life Throws You Off Course

We were so busy in the month of August that I didn't even have time to realize that our days in what once was our "forever home" were numbered. Then one day I got home from work and was half-way out of my car when it dawned on me, "This is our last night in our house."

Dani and I have decided to move in with my Grandmother for the time being as we continue our attempts to sell our house. By doing so we hope to save on some heating costs this winter while giving Grandma some much-needed helping hands around her home.

With this change in our living arrangements our financial situation has changed some too. It will likely change again once the house sells and we're out from under the burden of homeownership, and it will change again in a year or so when we find a new house... or apartment... or something.

All of this means we need to take a "back to basics" approach to our budget, which, when you think about it, isn't a bad thing to do every now and then anyway.

Since leading Financial Peace University, Dani and I have kept in touch with some of the people who attended. Some are doing well. Others have backslidden. One lady approached me last week and said, "I hope you're not planning another FPU reunion because my husband and I have made no progress with our finances at all!"

People in that kind of a situation think I'm going to be mad at them or disappointed, but there's no way I can fault them for their mistakes when I make plenty of my own. The more important thing is no matter how many times our financial mistakes trip us up that we dust ourselves off and get back up. Sometimes that may involve a budget "Reset," especially if you haven't been keeping track of your income and expenses.

We live in a society of perfectionism, where one mistake by a political leader or celebrity earns them a lifetime of public shunning, unforgiveness, and hatred. Anyone remember actor Mel Gibson's drunken anti semitic outrage back in 2006? Of course you do. Because despite his numerous attempts to publicly apologize for the incident and seek forgiveness from the jewish community, Gibson is still far more hated in America today than he is loved. Why? Because we found out he wasn't as cool and collected and heroic as the characters he portrays in film? Because we found out that he's a real human being with real problems?

Our culture, while admittedly imperfect, demands perfection. The moment someone doesn't live up to our expectations we diminish them.

Instinctively we apply this type of thinking to ourselves far too often. When we're faced with a project we can't complete perfectly, we quit. When stuck in a marriage that doesn't reach our standards, we divorce. When we're unable to follow a financial plan, we ignore it.

We know we're imperfect.

We say we're not striving for perfection.

Yet we fault ourselves, and others, when perfection is not obtained.

I don't know about you, but the word "absurd" comes to mind.

Perfectionism isn't really about being meticulous and perfect anyway. Essentially, it's about fear. We fear failure. We fear making mistakes. We fear disappointing others. Which is why people act so ashamed when they admit to me that their falling short on their financial budget.

Look, it's no surprise to me that you've fallen short. What would surprise me is if you said the budget is working great, that you've never screwed up, that you follow it to a T, you love it, because at that point I would just assume you're lying!

Maybe it's time to get back to some basics. Don't let the latest mistake keep you down. Revisit that budget, find out where you went wrong, and get back on track. Cut the fat. Mind the frivolous spending. Start putting money into savings again. Don't give up just because you've messed up.

Dani and I are going to be making lots of changes to our budget in the months ahead because our financial plan, as we laid it out years ago, has not become what we wanted it to be. Some of that's because of mistakes. Some of it's just plain the result of life interjecting the proverbial monkey wrenches. But all of that doesn't matter as long as we don't throw in the towel.

So, bear with us as we continue to figure it all out. And, while you're at it, pick up that budget, dust it off, and dive back in!

Keep pinchin' :-)

What Strawberries and Finances Have In Common

Remember those lovely little strawberry plants that I thought I had killed in my fridge? (You can catch up here in case you missed it).

Well, I'm happy to report that not only are they thriving in their new garden home—in fact, they're basically the only thing thriving in my garden—but they are also delicious! Take a look at those beautiful red rubies. I get to pick about this much almost every day.

If you ever consider growing strawberries consider planting everbearing ones. While you typically don't get a harvest of strawberries the first year you plant them, with everbearing plants you do. Why? Because after you pluck off all the first flowers that arrive—this helps the plant focus on growing—the everbearing plants continue to flower and produce strawberries. For someone that likes to be rewarded for their hard work right away, this is the way to go!

As I was picking strawberries the other day, my thoughts turned to our finances.

I know. Radical subject change. But bear with me here.

You might be thinking it's too late to start on your journey to financial freedom. Living debt free or creating a retirement plan may seem so impossible that it's not worth striving for, BUT THAT'S NOT TRUE! It's never to late!

Just like my strawberries that lived in the fridge for three weeks and nearly froze to death, you can still see fruit from your hard work even if you're only just beginning. Some of your hard work may pay off right away, like my everbearing strawberries. You may pay off a credit card or a small loan. It may not be much, but it's a start.

You should've seen the first strawberries I picked. They were so tiny they looked like chokeberries. My husband chuckled at them. But it was only the beginning! The strawberries we're seeing now are big and bright and delicious!

Creating a good financial base and climbing out of debt takes time, and it's never too late to start. So don't believe the lie that you missed the train. Hop on board and decide today that you want to live differently. Create a budget. Maybe check out a Financial Peace University class and start working your way to your financial goals.

Otherwise, if you sit in the fridge any longer, you probably will freeze.

Keep pinchin' :-)

Taking The Zap Out Of The Electric Bill

This past winter our electric bill seemed to sky rocket! It was CRAZY, and for this penny pinching girl, unacceptable!

For a year and a half it had been holding steady at $50-60 a month. Mind you we don't use the dryer—preferring to hang our clothes to dry when possible—we unplug things we aren't using, and turn off lights in rooms we aren't in, all in an effort to cut down electric costs. We were doing well for a time.

Then, all of a sudden, we got a bill in excess of $80! Not once, not twice, but many times. Our bills were $85 or more. This was NOT ok!

After taking the time to do some investigating I was able to pinpoint what I thought was the problem. A year before I had changed over our electric supplier because they were significantly cheaper than the only distributor we had available to us. I made a fatal mistake with this decision though, because the price I locked in at was only good for six months. After that I needed to lock in a different price. I forgot about this, and consequently put us into the variable price plan that changes from month to month.

Realizing this so late in the game didn't help matters, because locking in at the current price of almost DOUBLE what we were paying before wasn't cool.

So I decided to see what else was out there.

Thankfully I was able to do all my investigating online because I HATE calling people. (I'm not kidding. I usually make Jake do all the phone calls, and I handle online stuff.) Anyway, as I was investigating I found that there was a new electric supplier for our state, and, lucky for me, they had the best going rate. We're in the same situation though where I have to lock-in the rate in six months, but hopefully by then we will have moved so it won't matter. Plus, I think I learned my lesson.

Happy ending to my story: the last two months our bill has been back down to right around $50! When you have a zero-based budget—meaning, all of our money is accounted for and allocated—an increase of $30-to-$40 a month for electric ruins the whole thing!

Moral of my story: don't hesitate to shop around for the best rates. Electric, gas, oil, groceries, repairmen... Don't think you don't have options. And, if you get yourself into a short term fixed rate, make sure you follow up with it and re-enroll!

Keep pinchin' ;-)

Breaking Free Part 5: The Art Of Sustainable Sacrifice

It's been two years since Danielle and I started down this road toward debt-free living. It's been a challenge, a fun ride, a ministry, and a blessing, all rolled into one adventure. This week we'd like to look back on our journey, share some of the intricacies of how and why we do it, and hopefully encourage you to gain some ground in your financial battle.

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Saying that I don't complicate things is like saying a full moon doesn't throw a monkey wrench into the Wolf Man's daily grind.

I have a tendency to immediately over-think and over-complicate things, but when Danielle and I first started budgeting I forced myself to be intentional about keeping it simple. In fact that's one of Dave Ramsey's key points in Financial Peace University. He calls it KISS: Keep It Simple, Stupid.

So, first, we followed the plan. Simple.

Then we wrote our entire budget out on paper to make it easier to work with. I even used a pencil instead of a pen. Simple.

When we compiled our budgetary needs we put them into a small number of categories. For example: instead of having budget lines for cleaning supplies, tools, and home repair, we have one line item called Home Needs. See? Simple.

We found that a successful budget needs three main things in those first few months:

1. Discipline. You've got to keep at it. You've got to do the work. You've got to set it up and make your money work for you.


2. Realistic expectations. Unplanned expenses are going to happen, and the money to cover them has to come from somewhere.


3. Flexibility. A budget is rarely going to work properly from the get-go. It will need adjustment.

After about six months we had the budgeting thing down to a science.

Spend Less, Earn More

When it comes to paying off debt, Dave Ramsey points out that the two things that contribute the most to attacking debt are spending less and earning more. I'll give Danielle the most credit when it comes to earning more. That girl can work like a dog when she's got a goal. She took a lot of extra jobs on top of her full time job to earn extra money.

And when it came to spending less we both made a lot of sacrifices. We didn't cut out restaurants and movies at first, but over time we cut back at these things more and more with the understanding that we couldn't give them up forever.

That's what sustainable sacrifice is all about—sacrificing unnecessary expenses to accelerate progress for a period of time. The idea is to stay motivated as you see your sacrifice enabling you to get ahead in other areas financially. If you can get debt free in one year by sacrificing deeply, go for it! Otherwise, take a good look at your budget and determine what expenditures you can cut back and for how long.

In our case, we knew we'd have to sacrifice for about five years at least, and we made decisions based on what we thought we could handle for that amount of time. Had we gone into it without a determined timeframe we—mostly I—would've gotten too discouraged and probably given up.

I Gotta Have My Cookies

Sustainable sacrifice isn't about depriving yourself of everything you enjoy. It means being intentional about telling your money where to go. If you want to spend some of it at Dunkin Donuts, that's fine, just make sure you plan for it. Otherwise you get fat.

Oh, wait. Wrong topic. Well, it still sort of applies. See, now that my wifey is into being a Beachbody coach, and now that I've seen the tremendous success she's had with eating right, I've decided to work on adding a better dietary plan to my workout routines. But, like my personal spending money, if I don't have some junk food to look forward to I'm going to get real discouraged real fast.

So I prepared an entire batch of chocolate chip cookies and divided them up into little freezer bags of three. Every Saturday I know I have that beautiful, chocolaty sweetness to look forward to. If i didn't have that, I wouldn't keep track of what I was eating. A candy bar here. A brownie there. I wouldn't know from one week to the next how much junk food I was eating.

Knowing I've got cookies coming on Saturday makes the sacrifice during the week sustainable.

Sustainable sacrifice.

Now, just as a quick side note, the types of sacrifices that move the debt needle the fastest are monthly sacrifices like cable TV, subscriptions services, and the like. Maybe for this summer you decide not to purchase a golf membership. (I know, heresy!) Or if cutting out television entirely isn't an option, maybe a cheaper package with fewer channels is the way to go for the next year.

Making sustainable sacrifices will help you make progress, which will help keep you motivated to make more sacrifices to keep on keeping on.

What sacrifices have you made to dump debt?

Other posts in this series:
Part 1: My Personal Wake-Up Call
Part 2: How To See Some Hope
Part 3: Overcoming The Comparison Trap
Part 4: The Things We Didn't Give Up

Short-Circuiting Self-Sabotage To Win At Financial Recovery

To me, the hands-down best episodes of the hit sitcom Seinfeld are the ones where Jerry and George get to make a TV sitcom for NBC, and fail in spectacular fashion—though ultimately the failure is not their fault.

True to form, it's the slow-witted George Costanza—who believes that God will never allow him to be successful—and his self-sabotaging antics that nearly ruin their chances at fame. First he tries negotiating with the network for more money, which results in him and Jerry actually getting less. Then he gets involved in a romantic relationship with one of the show's producers, whom he ends up despising, but he's too afraid of losing their sitcom to he breaks up with her. Then he begins irritating the cast members. Then he has that "white discoloration" on his lip that he's convinced is terminal cancer. All of his nervousness over the possibility of success make almost incapable of actually becoming successful. In fact, he is pretty much the quintessential example of a hopeless, self-sabotaging individual.

Self-sabotage happens a lot with financial recovery. After a few months of disciplined budgeting and careful spending, some people start to miss the excitement of shopping, swiping credit cards, eating out, or entertainment. So they find themselves wandering the aisles of the mall "just to look," but in actuality they're feeding the growing urges to spend. Or they might start borrowing money from one area, like grocery money, to splurge in another.

Over time these little decisions short-circuit the entire budget, cause the person to get discouraged, and throw in the towel because they "just can't do it."

If you can’t break your addiction to financial excitement, you’re never going to achieve the kind of financial life that gives you peace.

True, spending money is exciting, and, yes, it's true that getting out of debt can be a total bore, but nothing good ever came from lazy behavior. Words like "discipline," "steadfastness," and "structure," are words that successful people are very familiar with. You want to loose weight? Discipline! You want to change your lifestyle? Steadfastness! You want to be rich some day? Get structured!

Here's another word: routine.

When it comes to getting in better physical shape, for example, I've noticed that the people who actually succeed at doing this have established routines. They don't work out every single day because they feel like—although sometimes they may feel like—they just do it.

How should paying off debt and building wealth be any different? How do you create more routine with money, and, most importantly, how do you stay on track when you're feeling bored or resistant.

Here are some ideas:

• Like Dave Ramsey always says, make a list. Even if the first item on your list says, "Make list," at least it will help you feel like you've accomplished something. Try listing your smallest debts first—credit card, car, house. Make a list of weekly budget-related tasks—Get groceries: $100, Get cleaning supplies: $20. Until you give yourself structure, you won't have any at all.


• Hold regular budget meetings. For the first year after FPU Dani and I met faithfully every week to go over our budget. Once we felt more confident in the process, we started meeting every couple of weeks. The point is, we meet and go over the budget together on a regular basis because there is no "one size fits all" budget. It has to be revisited every month, or seasonally at least.


• Dani and I have learned that we make better progress when we have hard and fast goals. We got more work done on the upstairs renovation in three days than we had in a month because we found out the realtor was coming to show our house on the weekend. And, in the past, whenever we have been adamantly focused on paying off a debt we have succeeded more quickly than we anticipated. Having goals works!


• Having fun is key to staying sane throughout this whole process. So what can you do to have fun that doesn't involve spending money? Dani loves to go to the beach. I like to chill in my hammock and read a book or write on my laptop. During the holidays we like to go look at Christmas lights. Museums. Parks. Parades. There's lots of fun, affordable entertainment to find if you look for it.

It can be hard to shift your mindset from over-spending to something as mundane as list-making and budgeting, but you have to believe that this is what will have the biggest impact on your level of financial peace. The more routine you establish, the better your chances of nipping those self-sabotaging behaviors in the bud.

Keep pinchin' :-)

The Ultimate Homemaking Bundle - Feather Your Nest This Spring

So, the hubby and I are fairly new to this whole blogging adventure. Originally we set out just to tell our story, keep a journal of our progress, and share what works and doesn't work as we journey to debt-free living.

While we enjoy this whole blogging thing it does take time, and so we ventured into the process of trying to earn a little money from our blog, hence the ads you may see, and the occasional "plug a product" post, in which we'll include a link to a product that we may earn some money on if it gets enough clicks. Honestly we haven't really made any money off of it so far, but since an income is secondary to our original goal we keep pressing on.

Just this week I was given the opportunity to plug an awesome bundle of e-books, which will be on sale until Monday. While this opportunity does offer me a pretty decent commission, I don't share it just because of that. After looking into all you can get from this deal I wanted everyone I know to hear about this amazing opportunity.

Here is a little video which will give you some info about why you need the Ultimate Bundle.

I purchased mine the other night and am so excited about all it has to offer. There are 78 e-books in this package covering topics like faith, kids, financial stewardship, food, heath and wellness, holidays and special events, homemaking, homeschooling, marriage, motherhood, pregnancy and babies, self-care, working from home, and blogging.

Not only are these fantastic books, but the authors seem like great people. By purchasing this bundle you are actually supporting missionaries, stay-at-home moms, and many working moms too! Here is a picture of some of the books included:

Epic, right?

And there's also about $200 in bonuses!

These books sold individually would come to a grand total of $698.

So, why am I sharing this with you? Because if you want to get your hands on all of these great resources and not pay $698, then all you need to do is purchase it between now and Monday night at midnight and you can get all of this and more for only $29.97 for the PDF files and $39.97 for Kindle versions. If this is something you think you would like to give to a friend they also have a special offer of buy two get the third free!

All you have to do is click on the picture below! 

I hope you enjoy this bundle as much as I am. Now I'm off to figure out how to make some "ice cream with nourishing ingredients" and then maybe read the Frugal Secrets of Real Foodies. If you have any questions about the bundle feel free to leave a comment and I will get back to you as soon as I can.

Keep pinchin' :-)

Creating A Budget Is Like A Bad Horror Comedy Movie

Dani and I decided to go through Financial Peace University just a few months after being married when we both realized that the different ways in which we handled money was going to get us into trouble. Dani is a saver. I'm a spender. Neither of us knew how to properly handle money and we were driving each other nuts.

I foresaw a major conflict in our future, and we both knew that we needed to get on the same page when it came to our budget. I heard about Financial Peace University through our church and strongly suggested that we take the class. Dani was glad to do it.

But the class alone was not our saving grace. Our first few months of budgeting were like a bad horror comedy. We'd argue. We'd cry. We'd get angry and frustrated at the piece of paper in front of us that told us how much money we didn't have. It was a turbulent time.

After about sixteen months of following the principles in FPU, we've finally got a system down. Budget meetings are quick and neither of waste any time crying or arguing because we know where our money is going, we can see the plan working, and we know it will continue to work as long as we keep employing it.

Now that we're leading an FPU class, we've realized that we're not the only ones who have a hard time jump-starting a budget. Setting aside money for upcoming payments is a hard task to do when you've got a payment due in one week. But both Dani and I can say from experience that it gets easier. Those first few months of budgeting are tough. We stumbled. We made mistakes. We had to erase and start over. But once our money started building up in our accounts, once we had three or four months of practice, things started to come together.

As put off as I was at first by the idea of budgeting, it was worth going through those few months of agony to develop a unified vision for our finances. The tension lifted. The crying stopped. Sure we have our moments every now and then, but things have gotten a lot better.

If you're not working on a budget with your spouse, start. Don't give up after a few months of turmoil. Keep at it. It WILL get easier. And you'll be happier for it.

Keep pinchin' :-)

How Not To Cry When Grocery Shopping On A Budget

I remember when we first started our budget. I thought $40 a week on groceries, toiletries and household products would be enough. The first few trips were like a game—I would add up each item to make sure I stayed on budget. It was pretty easy. Then we began to run out of things like razor blades, toilet paper, meat in the freezer, and it wasn't a game anymore. There were trips to the grocery store that made me want to cry because I wasn't able to purchase all the things I had on my list, and it seemed like I never was able to get anything extra to build up a pantry.

I'm sure if I had asked for more money my hubby and I would have found a way to get a few more dollars in that account, but I was determined to make it work. Slowly, I got better at knowing what was a good sale and what wasn't. I made some big purchases—like buying enough razor blades for a year—and even went without groceries one week in order to save a lot by buying in bulk. Eventually I was able to build up a little pantry of go-to items, so if one week there was a bigger expense we would still have plenty of food to choose from.

Last summer we raised four chickens and three ducks that currently live in our freezer... um, yeah, they're dead. I also froze zucchini, squash, green and yellow beans, carrots, celery, and pumpkin from my garden. Having those frozen veggies has been a huge help this winter because I'm able to use my frozen vegetables instead of buying canned ones. I've also been able to build up a good supply of frozen meats as I have found them on sale throughout the year.

I still only shop with $40 a week, but over a year later it has become much easier. I no longer feel like crying when I go to get everything on my list, because I know if I can't purchase something one week I have plenty at home to make up for it, and I can always get it next week.

So, if you are new to budgeting, and groceries or something else seems impossible to buy, just stick with it. You may have to increase your budget some because you didn't take into account all that you were going to need to purchase, but, then again, maybe you just need some more practice. Maybe you will have to choose to cut back on store bought snack food and frozen dinners in favor of homemade. It can work, and saving money on groceries can help a lot with paying off debt and living debt free.

Keep pinchin' :-)

Some Practical Steps We Took Toward Budgeting: Part 2

One of the things Dani and I have found helpful is to differentiate our Monthly Expenses from our periodic expenses, or what we call "Rollover Expenses." Understanding the difference has helped us budget more wisely for some of those bills that come up as regularly as every four or six months, or even every couple of years.

For example: Our town is weird when it comes to sending out its water bill. In fact, we're still not sure what the schedule is, but we know roughly how much it will be, so we've been preparing for that all year by setting aside a little money every month. By the time the bill comes we would have set aside enough money to cover it.

Here's an itemized breakdown of most of the things we budget for:

MONTHLY EXPENSES Tithing Mortgage Electricity Phone Internet Groceries Gas/Vehicles Health/Personal products ID theft Pocket money

ROLLOVER EXPENSES Home needs/Repairs Heating oil/Firewood Clothing Car repairs/tires Water License/Taxes Auto insurance Gifts Children Car replacement Savings

Dani and I have decided to cut out things like entertainment and restaurants for the time being, but back when we were budgeting for those things we put them under Monthly Expenses. If, at the end of the month, all the money in the entertainment budget hadn't been used we added it to whatever bill we were attacking the hardest that month. This helped us substantially with our "debt snowball."

Here's a great video from daveramsey.com to help beginning budgeters prioritize their spending.


No matter how you chose to go about budgeting: just do it! It's like the old saying goes, "Idle hands are the devil's playground." The same could be said for money—idle money that hasn't been dedicated to a line item on your budget is money just waiting to be spent on some frivolous thing. So give your money a plan. You'll find that the more you tell your money what to do the more of it you'll end up with.

Keep pinchin' :-)

Some Practical Steps We Took Toward Budgeting: Part 1

Before Dani and I took Financial Peace University, I knew next to nothing about budgeting. Even what I thought I knew about budgeting was actually nothing because, let's face it, I was still broke.

If you're looking at starting a budget for the first time, or maybe refining the one you've got, here are some of the steps we went through to form the budget that we use today. Keep in mind that forming our budget took about six months of strategic planning, and trial and error. Point being: there's no "one size fits all" budget, so you need to take the following as little more than a guideline and then mold it to suit your financial needs.

1. We started by figuring out our monthly, after-tax income. Then we made the decision that, no matter what, we wouldn't spend more than we make. No matter what, we wouldn't dip into next month's income. This is actually a pretty essential decision to make. America is a "buy on credit" culture, but if you're ever going to be free of creditors and debt you've got to commit to spending only what you have.


2. Next we looked at our bills—electricity, mortgage, phone, etc. We totaled these up and subtracted it from our monthly income.


3. The next thing we looked at were the not-so-regular bills—or what we call "Rollover Expenses." Things like car registration, license renewal, and insurance, bills that don't necessarily come around every month, but they WILL come around. We figured up the total annual expense of each of these things and divided it by 12 so we knew exactly how much to set aside each month. The money for these expenses builds up, or "rolls," into an account dedicated to paying off these expenses.


4. Once our essential expenses were covered we looked at what income we had left and decided how much we wanted to allocate for things like entertainment, restaurants, and gifts. Christmas, birthdays, anniversaries—these are expenses that come up year after year, so we should be planning for them just as if they were a car payment. If, like us, you want to buy a Valentine's Day gift for your spouse this year, decide as a couple how much money you want to spend on gifts and then be intentional about setting aside a little bit every month to cover it.

But, above all, no matter how you form your budget, keep it simple. Dani and I try to keep our budget to one sheet of paper that we can go through in about 10 or 15 minutes once a week. Any longer than that and our patience begins to run thin—with the budget and each other!

Keep pinchin' :-)

The Importance of Doing It Together: Part 2

Dani is a saver. I'm a spender. And we're both at the extreme end of those polar opposites. I can't hold onto money to save my life; it flows through my fingers like water over rocks, whereas money stops with Dani like a skydiver with no parachute.

So when we started budgeting we found that our dramatically opposing financial skill sets did not like each other. It was tempting for me to just let her do the budgeting—she's better at math. She enjoys the organization—but Dave Ramsey stresses repeatedly that there is value in managing your money as one.

No matter how you choose to do your budgeting process, if you and your partner don't talk about the spending plan, there's no telling how many miscommunication issues you'll experience.

Such as:

• Your husband is happy because the money for "home expenses" has accumulated enough to replace the broken window, but you thought you were going to use that money to finish the kitchen countertop.


• Your wife takes the kids to the water park thinking there's plenty of money in the entertainment budget to cover the trip, not knowing that you wanted to go out with the guys on Friday.


• If your husband moves money from the grocery budget to cover an unexpectedly high bill and you don't know about it, when you swipe your debit card at the market you'll see that embarrassing DECLINED light up.


• Your wife isn't keeping track of how much money you've budgeted for restaurants, and after eating out three times already this month she makes dinner plans with her mom at Olive Garden. Uh-oh! DECLINED.

It cannot be stressed enough: for a budget to be successful you and your spouse must have a shared vision for your finances. And, trust me, this may take time. It took about eight months before Dani and I really felt like we were on the same page with our financial priorities. And once we were, our budget became even more focused, we became more determined, and our debt started going down faster while we started saving more money.

I said it once, but I'll say it again: if you want to create a successful financial plan that will work for you, you and your spouse have got to work together.

Keep pinchin' :-)

The Importance of Doing It Together: Part 1

There's a "security gland," explains Dave Ramsey, that all women have. It's located behind their ears and when they don't feel financially secure that gland starts to spasm.

Obviously he's exaggerating, but his point is this: it's important to most women to feel financially secure, to feel like they are taken cared for, and, believe it or not, it doesn't always have to do with how much money they have. Guys, you can work 50, 60, 70 hours a week and still have a wife who doesn't feel financially secure.

For my wife, a large part of feeling that security was knowing that we were on the same page. She needed reassurance from me that I supported our financial goals, that I would follow our plan, and that she could trust me to properly manage our income. She needed to know that I was with her.

But budgeting shouldn't just be about making your wife feel better. And, trust me, it's not.

For me, I realized that I needed my wife's input. It was helpful for me to go over our budget with her because she caught my mistakes, helped me understand certain processes, and generally alleviated the stress I feel when working with numbers. (I still refuse to have anything to do with taxes. We either take them to H&R Block or she does them. I find the process too frustrating to bother with.)

I have a friend whose wife is like me in this area. She finds the budgeting process too stressful, and so he makes up the budget every month. He is faithful, however, to keep his wife routinely apprised of their financial circumstances.

Going over your budget with your spouse is such an essential part of a successful money management plan. There's basically two ways you can do it:

1. You and your spouse go over the budget once a week, or once a month. Together, the two of you keep track of your expenses, making sure neither one of you is going over budget in any of your areas of allocated spending. If neither one of you excels with math or particularly enjoys budgeting, this is the best option.


2. If you or your spouse is more suited to handling math and numbers, and is agreeable to handling the budget on his/her own, it's fine if the lion's share of the work load falls upon them. But the two of you must confer with each other on a regular basis as to where your budget stands. Moreover, you need to have conversations about where you want your money to go. It's ok if only one of you gets to be the numbers crunched, but you both have to be involved in budgeting.

If you're going to make your money work for you, you and your spouse need to work together. If you don't, there is a nearly endless list of possible miscommunications than can arise.

To be continued...

Giving While Penny Pinching

One of the things my hubby and I have made a point to be faithful in is giving to our local church. Budgeting for this is really important, because it is too easy to use this money on unexpected expenses or to help balance your budget when you go a little over.

But when you budget for tithing, you're creating a plan for that money as though it were for your mortgage or your heating bill. You've set it aside for a purpose, which means there's less of a chance it will slip into thin air.

God loves a cheerful giver, and I think the proof of this is in how he gives more when he sees that you're joyfully giving what you can. Here's what I mean: It took about a year for us to realize that we weren't tithing out of the extra money that we made each month—Jake's photography jobs, my babysitting and crocheting. Once we realized that we should be giving back to God from the excess he provides, we thought and prayed about how we could do that, and, like usual, God suggested a creative way of giving that has turned out to be a lot of fun.

We've created an account in which our tithing from any excess income builds up. This money is available to us whenever we feel led to give in a way outside of our regular weekly church giving. Recently we decided to use some of the money from this account to bless a little girl through Angel Tree, an outreach through Prison Fellowship. On Tuesday I went to Toys"R"Us to find a dolly for this precious little girl, and knowing I had money in our "extra giving" account meant I didn't even have to concern myself too much with price tags. It was so much fun!

I walked up and down the aisle where all the dolly's lived, touching them, checking to see what ages they were appropriate for, until I found one that was perfect for the 18 month old girl we had selected. I bought her a couple of outfits and a bag with two bottles, a bowl, a spoon, and a fork. I admit, I splurged. And I know I'll never get to meet this little girl, but I do wish that I could be a fly on the wall of her house on Christmas morning to see her open this gift, knowing it came from her daddy who couldn't be with her this Christmas, but loved her enough to send her a gift through me. It's things like this that bring joy to my heart and keep me motivated to penny pinch so that someday we will be able to give so much more!

Keep pinchin' :-)